a walk in the rain.

I stood there for a moment, just taking stock of the situation.  I have to admit, I felt a bit stunned, but certainly not surprised.  My senses were acute; I could hear the rain, cars in the distance, a distant TV.  I took a deep breath, then began to rummage through the bags that were on the floor in front of me.  First, the backpack.  I always threw change into it instead of my pocket (carried the damn thing everywhere, that's what it's like when you have no license).  I was on a mission.  The local convenience store was six-tenths of a mile away (alcoholics know these kind of things) and the 24 oz. cans of malt were $1.49.  I figured I needed at least three to complement the bottle of wine I drank in the cab during the last 45 minutes.  First, the front pocket.  Bingo!  5 quarters, a few dimes, a few nickels.  I was on my way.  The main pouch delivered to me another dollar in change; I just about had enough for 2 cans at this point.  Then, suddenly, everything went dry.  Duffel bag - nothing.  Boxes - nothing, except for a few pennies.  I was screwed.  Two cans wouldn't do it.  I had $3.10 and needed another buck and a half or so.  I was getting worried.

Then, it hit me.  I still had about two dollars in my checking account!  And, I had my debit card with me!  It would be enough.  I put that black backpack on and headed into the rain, wearing the same dirty clothes I had had on for two days.  I would be there in less than ten minutes.  Life was good; I felt better already.

I speed-walked to the store, grabbed 3 cans of malt from the cooler, and walked to the counter.  I took a minute to smooth my soaked hair back, trying to put on an air of nonchalance, and placed the cans on the counter.  'I need to pay for two of these separately' I said importantly.  'No problem', said the clerk.  I paid for the first two with the loose change, then watched her put them in a plastic bag.  She rang up the second one, and I ran my card through the reader, hoping to god I was right about still having some assets in there.  I punched in my code, held my breath, and the clerk asked me, 'do you need a separate bag?' ' No', I said. ' I'll just put that bag in my backpack.' 'Receipt?' 'No thanks!'  I crammed that bag in my backpack and got out of there.

I made it about 20 steps away from the store when it hit me. I never used that toilet in the jail cell.  I had to take a shit, and I had to take one right now. The store I was just in had no bathroom. There was no way I was gonna make it back to the house. I felt like I might be headed for trouble.